My Problems With God, and With the Godly

I've been harping a lot on religion lately in class recently. The bizarre thing is that I've been defending religion in class, which is bizarre for anyone who knows me. Me and organized religion parted ways a long way back. Probably about the time the nun told me God made the Challenger blow up. But whatever.

Last week, in one of my classes, we were discussing the witch burnings of the 16th and 17th century. Someone trotted out the number 6 million dead, and compared it to the Holocaust. That alone was pretty offensive to me, both for the moral and historical ignorance. (6 million dead women is not a credible number. Most historians believe less than 100,000.) Someone else called it genocide, and I had to physically keep my mouth shut from snapping at that moron. But the prof asked a decent question - why has the western, Christian obsession with witchcraft persisted? We still see it rear its ugly head in the occasional Harry Potter book-burning. (Book Holocaust? Book Genocide?)

The other students in my class offered a number of explanations, and they were about what you would expect from a leftist, academic perspective - basically mocking the religious, and denigrating the idea that people could be legitimately concerned about their children's well-being by wanting Harry Potter banned. Now, normally I'd join in the mockery, but I felt the need to balance the debate a bit, so I pointed out that for the most pious Christians, Harry Potter isn't just children's literature, it's blasphemy, possibly idolatry, and pretty certainly a ticket to hell. If you believe in hell, then Harry Potter is a massive threat to your child's future happiness.

I didn't quite get back a sea of blank stares, but I don't think the class was very receptive to my arguments. In any case, it's worth pointing out that not all Christians seem to believe in hell or Satan, based on regular polls. This makes me wonder what exactly being a Christian means in this day and age. I'm relatively certain that the New Testament makes it clear that Satan took control of Judas and caused him to betray Jesus. So it's not like Satan plays a small role in Christian mythology or whatever. I doubt a lot of ancient Greeks were walking around claiming to be devout, while not believing in Zeus.

Speaking of, in class tonight a fellow student said something which shocked me: An openly gay man, he said that his friends who were also gay hated the current Pope, didn't go to mass, but called themselves Catholic. And I had to restrain myself from shouting, "No, they're not fucking Catholic!" Just so we're clear, I'm not Catholic either. I'm pretty sure that atheists aren't welcome in that particular club. But the Catholic Church has some pretty clear rules on who is and is not a Catholic. Ironically, this young man's gay friends aren't disqualified from being Catholics because they're gay - they're just sinners. (Join the club. No, really. We've got less rules, and no membership fee.) No, what disqualifies them from being Catholic would be the whole hating the Pope, not going to mass, and presumably not taking communion.

This bothers me, because we've come to think of faith as something that is simply asserted, not something that is conferred, or even earned. So this guy's homosexual protestant friends get to call themselves Catholics, and it has about as much basis in reality as me calling myself a solider, or an NFL linebacker.

Let me put it this way - I don't call myself a Christian anymore, for the simple reason that I don't believe that Jesus was the son of God, that he was resurrected three days after he died, or that he ascended to heaven. Now, I do believe that Jesus' teachings are excellent ones to follow, but that isn't enough for me to earn that label. Why not? Because the Christian churches have this little thing called the Nicene Creed, which puts some pretty definite limits on who does and does not qualify. Guess what - I don't. And I'm fine with that. It doesn't leave me bereft, and I certainly don't feel like it limits my ability to criticize Christian acts or theology.

Words have meaning, especially in religion. Which is how it should be. And yes, the Catholic church does get to set the rules for who can and cannot call themselves Catholic, and Christians do get to do the same for the word "Christian", and Jews, and Muslims, and so on. Otherwise these words become meaningless. I don't claim to be a black, jewish homosexual, because I'm not. That, and it would be offensive to black, jews, and homosexuals for me to try and claim their status. Similarly, I'm offended for Catholics when this guy's friends claim to be Catholic. Not because it's right that the Church condemns them (it manifestly is not) but because they don't meet the entrance criteria. It's not like gays aren't welcome at other churches. Frankly, if you've got the courage to come out of the closet, you should have the courage to leave the Church of Rome, right?